Farewell Assembly;
goodbyes are the hardest things to say.
but
it marks the start of a new beginning.

time crawled, brisked and zoomed past. in a blink of an eye, the days in AJC has come to an end; a closure to the 18 months here. images flashed through my mind like a movie playing in the theatres. its like watching my own life video. a short summary of my days in this little gold mine called Anderson Junior College.

J1
i vividly remember that time when i told sharlene how i felt when i came to aj for choir auditions. there was something different about how i felt about the school...something special; a feeling that i didnt have while i was in NY. even though i didnt make it through the dsa auditions, sub-consciously i knew i'll be back in aj eventually.

so you guessed it. i landed up in aj despite it not being my first choice of school. initial days were relatively okay, until the resilience workshop around second month into the new term. conflicts arose and bitterness somehow became the only flavour around. the amount of politics was more than sufficient to prepare me for a post at the White House in the states. i thought i could survive on my own, not needing any friends. i even psycho-ed myself that its just a mere 2 years, i can do this without anyone standing by me. but each time something happened, i felt so miserable till an extent where the heart and eyes overflowed. you have no idea. then the situation in choir wasnt getting any better cause they just came back from the italy trip and everyone had their own small cliques. socialising was like asking me to move mountains. yes.

towards the end of the year, things got better and i found new friends in people whom i thought i'd be with last in the world. a classic example of changing tides eh. expect the unexpected.

it was the beginning of many beautiful friendships.

J2
things started off pretty ok. choir was awesome with everyone slogging out their guts for syf preparation.i think i see the choir mates more then i see my classmates. days with cca can easily end at 8 plus, but we all enjoyed ourselves generally. then there was the acapella thingy. it has always been my dream to perform on stage in front of a large crowd and so i pluck up that a whole lot of courage i had within, stepped forward and wala! i ended up singing the melody line for mass civics during asthetics week. then we were asked to sing for AJ's 25th Anniversary Concert @ Republic Poly's cultural centre. singing with min huay, evelyn, teng hui and jon tan was one of the best experiences i've had in my 18 years of life. for the first time, we looked deep into the piece, thought of the dynamics to do and practiced basically wherever we went! the power of music was so powerful that even the pple around us had the song stuck in their heads :)

those were the beautiful memories i'll never ever forget.

friendships fostered. bonds grew. i realised that the group never failed to have conficts on each of our birthdays. funny how we can be a teeny weeny bit childish at times. but there were moments where we just laugh heads off at each other's stupidity and simply being ourselves. only missing things when they're gone? perhaps.

but most importantly, i found an awesome friend amidst all the heart aches and grey skies. one of the best.

so much memories, so much emotions, so many things to say. i dont know where to start. certain things i wanna say to certain pple but am afraid that i'll be put off. some apologies, that i fear may not be accepted.

really dont want things to end so soon. too much memories, too dear. how do i go on from here...

time's trial starts from now.
are we all up to it?
will we succumb to temptations?
will we throw in the towel?
will we wave the white flag?

time is of the essence.
cherish whatever there is

no regrets.

good luck peeps for the upcoming As.
ace it pple! :)



"sometimes goodbye
though it hurts in your heart
is the only way for destiny

sometimes goodbye
though it hurts is the only now
for you and me

though its the hardest thing to say
i'll miss your love in every way

so say goodbye
but dont you cry
cause true love never dies"

i finally put a name to the indescribable nostalgia i've been having for the past week. conclusion? its the graduation feeling. yes. its the feeling where the major exams are arriving and following that, friends bid farewell. not knowing where we'll go, how we'll all turn out to be, what the future beholds for us, or how friendships will become. dont really like that feeling cause it makes me feel even more vulnerable to emotional setbacks than i already am. goodbyes are the hardest things to say. really.

someone once told me that there's a season to everything. summer, winter spring; sports season; love season; friendship season etc. because there's a season, it means nothing lasts. well. i wouldnt dare deny cause like ups and downs, there's a season to everything. as much as i wanna deny a season to friendship, i have to agree that there are ups and downs. but i believe that downs dont mean termination of friendship or permanent ignorance of each other's existence. in simplistic terms, things just arent as high and exciting as always. if everyday and everytime things are exciting, soon you'll start equating exciting to boring. an example of words from different worlds overlapping. sometimes its not that bad enjoying the silence together and just appreciating each other's company :)

i treasure friendships more than anything else. its a lifetime investment; a gamble im willing to take.



reciprocal?

wow..time flies. its the month of october already.perry's been complaining that i havent updated my blog for a super long time. haha

lets see. 2 weeks. prelims came and went. what can i say? i tried, i hoped and im back to where i started. but lets not go into there; i can crap an entire post based on my grumbles about exams. all i can i say is, thank god for friends by my side who constantly gave me encouragements, support and loads of TLC :) what would i do without them.

loads happened and i dont know where to begin. conflicts, misunderstandings, tears, fatigue, frustration, rage, i-dont-wanna-care times, memorable moments, cherished relations, positive atmosphere, awesome times. extreme ends eh... haha rather emotionally drained, but i suppose some things are simply worth it :)

i think being sick comes together with a nostalgic feeling. its like a package thingy. i get this super familiar feeling. hmmm..how do i put it. just a familiar feeling that i felt a long time ago. it just mysteriously came back a few days ago. still lingering. maybe it'll be gone when i recover over the weekends :)

UNFORTUNATELY, A levels are like 30 plus days away. serious, its so surreal that im about to take the A levels and enjoy the long awaited liberation before i brace myself to face the aftermath probably in april. it seems like only yesterday i took my Os. time sure took its time to CRAWL. haha i dont know how things will turn out and i certainly dont know what my future will be like. but i guess all i can do now, is to study and give it my best shot. those in the same boat, JIAYOUS!!! twin: DONT YOU DARE GIVE UP. smack you left right center ah.

oh.there are some pple who blatantly flaunt their grades on facebook and it kinda irks me. maybe im having sour grapes. but hey, cant pple just be humble? there's like this guy who posted " B...what a lousy grade. 1 more mark to an A!" wtf. sometimes, pple like him can jolly well burn in hell or something. may they get strangled by their own notes. talk about man's destruction by their own hands.

kk, enough of ranting. some shots from the past few days! :)

survival kit!
 

sexy RAD ferrari! :P


 

A.S.S
 

YJ flexing this muscles. or is it fats.HAHA!






 

they were playing SUKIYAKI! boy do i miss my acapella singing.
 

hehe. self explanatory.
 

jon was super high. you shouldve totally seen him LIVE. hilarious shit.




 

" Leap of Faith"


 

:D
 

 



 

if only we had more time to stop in our tracks and appreciate nature like this gorgeous sunrise :)
 


more ranting...

okay even if you're joking, i dont think im on the same frequency as you to share the same magnitude of humour you possess. there are certain things i dont joke about and there are certainly some topics i dont drag into a joke. -.- perhaps you didnt mean it and perhaps you meant every single word. maybe im fortunate to have someone like _____. maybe ______ stayed outta pity. you may be right, you may be wrong. and i believe i know my own friend better than you do. i dont think you're in any position to comment, let alone crushing my ego. maybe it was a question you asked that caught me dumbfounded and thus the unsatisfied feeling. " what makes you think you deserve such a good friend?" you could have just shut up. the world is peaceful when you keep quiet.

special thanks to Perry! for listening to me when no one else was around. for simply walking in my shoes and whined together with me about academics. for the countless encouragements you've given me. work hard together! lets hope we'll make it :)

i miss ajchoir. i really do. i miss the company, the music, the singing, the bimboticness. i miss kwei. i miss the nice nice chords. i miss blending with the other sections. i miss screaming my lungs out just to hit the last note on the keyboard. i miss our random singing sessions outside choir room. i miss Water Night! nostalgic. yes.

i guess nostalgic moments have gotta wait. i think i'm gonna have a super big void in me when i leave aj. too much too dear.

I only have that much time left…

okay. a brief update.

basically the prelims started. GP was...erm. im just keeping my fingers crossed and hoping for the best.

it'll be mug mug mug and grow fat from now on.
ahhh...i feel the fats wobbling already.
lets see...3 months not running?
tell me about it man...

parents and bro are going overseas tmr. YESSSSSS!!!! HOME ALONE! HURRAYYYY!!!! gosh. its the best liberation. i could use some time alone, without any disturbance and stuff. i cant wait. 3 days! pple, feel free to come over and disturb me. what a contradiction. lols

prelims gonna continue next week. things are gonna get pretty intense. i dont know how im gonna handle all these. but i guess i just gotta try and see how things go. good luck aint good enough. i need a miracle.

to those on the same SHIP: mug hard! and pray harder.
 
 

( rants. read at your own expense. ).

 

Just another random person